A quiet morning in the hut village of Brawlsgarden. Many a green skin are just coming round from another night of drinking, fighting, repeat…
Some are nursing sore heads, some sore faces, but most are quiet… not all…
Boggy the swamp troll, not renown for intellectual agility, is reflecting on the last few months.
“Ok boss… I fink I got dis now. Last year some da boyz go t’city fera’ big ol’ fight?”
“Yeah Boggy” said Dexter… “Dis ain’t new stuff, we bin talkin’ bout this for eva”
“Yeah yeah yeah” said Boggy getting visibly excited now… “An after ya fight sum dem other folk for bit, turns out youz not in a fight at all? Hahahha”
“Yeah Boggy… turnz out we woz on fooz ball grass… not fightin’ grass. An all the folk cheersin’ were cheersin’ for da fooz ball!”
“Bwhahaha!! So why you not leave?”
“Cuz Crunchy P sed… dem folk still cheersin’ wen we bash dem other folk. Let’s ‘tend to play fooz ball an carry on bashin dem other folk! After da fight dem folk still give us gold!”
“Ah, Crunchy P da smartestist Orc da is!”
Dexter growled. The rivalry between the two of them was legendary in the village.
“No! I da smartestist! Was Dexter sed that we get some bigga Boyz an go back!”
“Oh oh oh, dats when I come in?!”
“Yeah Boggy, my idea t’bring da troll! More bashin’ means more cheersin’ means more gold for drinkin’!”
“Oh… I got it now! Dem fights woz much fun!” Boggy was grinning from ear to ear.
“Yeah, was bestest, we got so much gold for da boyz, we drink for weeks!”
“So wen we gonna back fer sum more bashin’ Dex?!”
“Nex’ month Boggy wen da fightin’… I meanz fooz grass opens agen!”
“Oh… but I sin dem fancy folk in matchin’ cloth go t’city on da karts last week…”
“Wha?!” Said Dexter dropping his breakfast ale…
“Yeah” replied Boggy. “An wen da boyz are sleepy in da noon (afta all da drinkin’), me big earz ‘earz the cheersin’ in t’city!”
Dexter jumped up and let out an almighty cry!
Boyz! Dey started da fightin’ without us!!! Ge ya shit, da WAAAARRGHIORS are goin’ back t’city!!”