Carlos Brittlebark interviews Chop Suey & Psycho

Greeeting sports fans its me again Carlos BrittleBark with a rather special programme for you tonite bought to you by the by WOWLOF and its sponsors Tritex Gaming LTD.

This evening we have a couple of guests from the WOWLOF finals. Many know this team as one man has made a real brutal name for himself over the few seasons so much that we have increased security on set Chop Suey and not to forget the System of a touchdowns Touch down scorer Psycho.

Well greeting to you both and may i say wow 3 seasons and you have made the finals ever time that’s pretty impressive record and that just your team you both have a pretty impressive record each now just for the audience Chop Suey how many casualties have you caused over you entire carrier?
“36” *Chop Suey smiles*
WOW that is impressive i mean it no wander you have received so many death threats. The most recent one from Coach Malkin of the baby bells where if I’m not mistake was your first ever touchdown?
“HA couch Malkin was a weak southling Blaggard. He never had the chance against me. I have never taken any of the threats seriously as the gods have always smiled on me.”
Well your about to take on the Masochistic Sadists in the finals how are you feeling? as last time you where here you faced you where facing Prehensile Renegades.
“We will win this season as the dark elves will pay in blood for those that we lost last season. In honour of both Marmalade and D Devil who fell to the renegades i shall hurt ever elf i catch”
A bold statement from one of the leagues finest killers. read more

The Preview Show – Semi Finals

“Welcome BloodBowl fans, to this, the Semi-Final show.  We will be looking at all the upcoming matches in both WoWLoF and WoWCoF, and discussing who will make the finals, and who will fail and not be remembered.  I’m Brenda, and I’m joined by Amanto Hugnkyss, and his partner in …… well, annoying me.  Spruce Lee.  Welcome to you both.”

“Why thank you darling, it’s soooo fabulous to be here once again.  And may I say how delightful you are looking today”.

“No you may not.  So let’s look at the WoWCoF semifinals first off. We have the Cotanasburg Comrades up against Foul & Tickle, with our other game being between Runic Rampage & The Poker Men.  Both matches being Humans against Dwarves.  Amanto, let’s look at the Comrades vs F&T.” read more

The Stunty Off nears …….. by Domme Inatrix

Can you feel that tingling sensation; that delicate mix of fear and bloodlust? This is what the game is all about. I can already smell the blood on the air.

No wait, that’s a pasty…

Oh for Nuffle’s sake, it’s the stunty off.

I came out of retirement for this? For seven centuries I was the queen of blood; hundreds of confirmed kills, and some of them even on the pitch! The crowds would scream my name in ecstacy!

Alas, it’s all come down to this, a match up between orc droppings and the team too short for the rides at the Kislev circus. It’s a bad sign when halflings take to blood bowl. How bad a cook do you have to be to think that being trampled into the mud, game after game, is a better option? read more

Neill. Malkin. The Rivalry.

So following his defeat to Coach Malkin and his team, The Baby Bells.  Coach Neill had this to say:-

With the recent news of coach Ben Malkin’s move next season we caught up with coach Neill for his thought on his rivals chances next season.

“Prepare to be disappointed Khemri fans, if there are any!Malkin used all his luck in the first round of the play offs! What you mistook as a team coming together under Malkin was actually just a team desperately trying to survive on the blood bowl field despite him! The Doomaxes are coming for Malkin and whatever pathetic team he coaches will be turned to dust!” read more

Match Report: Sadists vs Bloody Nine

Following the hullabaloo and the razmataz all that was left was the game. A quarter final match up between two sides with differing strengths and philosophies. The Bloody Nine who had shocked the world by finishing second in Bugmans. Not the most prolific touchdown scorers or casualty causers but with a superb defensive record (only 6 conceded) and reputation for doing enough. Shorn of their star player Friendly (RIP) the Nine set their stall out early, with Coach Barnes commenting in the pre match press conference “we’re going to take as long as possible to score and cause as much damage as possible” read more

Coctang, refreshing energy drink.

As the temperature rises throughout the long and arduous season, the Comrades decided to have an open training session to boost fan morale at the city’s local park. A long session filled with a few fan participation exercises occurred but not all was as it seemed, there was obviously gossip. The main topic of conversation was the basherz top guy Coach Cunningham and his mysterious new markings noticed at the end of the play off fixture vs System. Markings that looked somewhat similar to markings seen on the damaged collarbone on star thrower Dura Cotan when he removed his training Jersey to give to a young fan at the end of the his participation in a throwing exercise. Mutterings of a poor taste tattoo or something more sinister? Not noticed before the loss to the Knights of Winstone fans are adamant this is a new feature on Cotan. Coach Baker held a press conference after the session and when asked about the nature of the marking, Baker simply replied “Dura called in a favour. I’m well aware of the goings on in the team and everything is above board and we’re doing our best to ensure the fitness and health levels are at their highest”. The fans although gossiping about this idnt seem too concerned as most seemed hopeful of their progress to the next round of the playoffs despite a difficult and unfortunate season. This press release also featured the announcement of the Cotanasburg Comrades latest training ground sponsor “Coctang” the new Orange, Berry and Apple flavoured beverage range from the new joint business venture from both Cheese and Cotan. read more

It’s on. The Stunty Off. There can only be one …….

*cameras still rolling*
We tune back into the live feed for some breaking news…
*Binky and Ghaastie are lying around on the floor, empty glass bottle lying everwhere*
*A stick from off shot pokes the pair of them*
*Binky sits up, rubs eyes, readjusts hair do*
‘Oh… Hello again everyone… I’m guessing you didn’t quite get enough action yesterday’
*Ghaastie still snoores* ‘zzzzzzz…. Brrrrap’
*Cue dancing goblin this time holding a pie*
‘Thank you Gilbert… I’ve just received this pie… Perfect for a hangover’
*Binky goes to eat it, but Gilbert waves his arms around going crazy and interrupts… He then points at the crust and then walks off stage*
‘oh… Oh my nuffleness! It appears that the head coach of the Piemen Matt Smith is calling out the madcap midgets coach Andy Hawkes to… And I quote
.. prove who the best stunty team is in WoWLoF!’
*Ghaastie wakes up with a jolt* ‘You wot fam?’
‘I know how exciting… We await the Madcap’s reply!’
*Sound of fizzing off stage*
‘Is that you Ghaastie?’
‘Nah, me don’t fizz’
*Gilbert wanders back on stage holding a bomb, skipping as he approaches*
‘No Gilbert… Don’t… Stop, wait!’ *Binky runs off stage followed by Gilbert*
‘Eh yo… What day say on da bomb?… ‘ang on… I fink I can read it cos den words are small… I. T ‘S…. O.N.’
*Takes a minute for Ghaastie to register*
‘Yes fam… There’s gonna be a full on beef between them tiny teams… Piemen Vs Midgets!’
*Explosion off stage*
*Cameras go to static* read more

It’s Super Crunch time, brought to you by Binky & Ghaastie

WOWLOF Super Crunch

‘Welcome back to everyone who joined us for the WoWCoF crunch on Cabal2 and if you’re just joining us for the first time this afternoon, then you’re in for an absolute treat…’ ‘Deez boss men are blessed, me tell ya’  ‘Yes I think what Ghaastie is trying to say is that with the WoWLoF Super Crunch playoffs, these really are the best teams the league has to offer’  ‘Them score bare touchdowns, smash up dem opponents like splat, kchacckk, ka-ting, ka-ting, true blessed in the name of Nuffle’ read more

The Binky & Big Ghaastie Show

IT’S CRUNCH TIME IN WOWCOF

‘Hello everybody… welcome to the Crunch!  I’m Binky Bilgewater and with me is Big Ghaastie.  This is the day that sorts the men from from the boys on the hallowed turf of the WoWLoF field’

“Eh… you should know about sortin dem men from de boyz.. you get me?’

‘I don’y quite understand your meaning there Ghaastie, do you care to explain’

‘Nah fam… I’m guessing that those that know know, ya feel me out there me bredbin” *Ghaastie points out to audiance* read more

This is it, the last week

And so now my friends there is great joy and great sadness as we reach the final curtain. Great joy because the story we have told has been truly epic. There has been heroism, there has been pride, there has been strength in adversity. There has been nobility, sportsmanship, great rivalries and bitter emnities. But sadness as well because it’s over for another year.

There is no getting away from it. This is the biggest night in the history of wowlof. A record number of games! Every participant still able to make the play offs! Seeding spots still up for grabs. I cannot find a superlative that seems to do it justice. So ill just call it Tuesday!!! Because this is how we role in this the greatest of leagues. This is how we role in WoWLoF. read more

Last but one ……..

Welcome back folks to the Penultimate week of our regular season. That’s right people. The end is in sight and its time to get serious!
As ever this weeks Preview is brought to you by https://www.tritex-games.co.uk/ If you are thinking of starting a new team for next season now would be a good time to check them out and see what you can put together!

Let us begin with Bugmans and the two games this week from there.

– – – – – – – – – – read more

Match report, Midgets vs Foul & Tickle

Foul and Tickle vs Madcap Midgets

It was never expected to be a good match for the Midgets, Dwarfs being strong, tough and rather well trained at tackling away dodgers. While Goblins being, well, goblins. But despite this 21,000 fans in total showed up (in the Midgets favour) to watch the game.
Maybe this could be the Midgets moment of glory? It certainly started that way, the crowd went wild as Ripper Bolgrot took to the field, and as the kick was made fellow troll Dan Vamme, not wanting to be shown up by the star player (and in a rare moment of lucidity) took out Losgrom Nightmane with a vicious tackle. Luckily the apothecary was there to bandage up any serious injuries. Dickie Mork, in true fanatic fashion, dominated the centre line until he was eventually ganged upon and knocked out by the dwarves and even newbie Looney Craniel Daig looked to be earning his money, fouling and hacking at the bearded ones with abandon.
Foul and tickle put up a good defence but The Midgets seemed to actually be gaining the upper hand – until a lucky tackle freed up the ball and the goblins characteristic bad luck began to show. Grutgurum Ironguard wiped out Rurt Kussel and the momentum was gone. Greenskin after greenskin began to fall to the floor as the ball was expertly stolen, then ran in by Grukdrem Ashtank. 1-0 to F&T by the end of the first half.
Things went from bad to worse in the second half, now lacking both secret weapons and any numerical superiority Foul and Tickle systematically took the Madcap Midgets apart. Despite the best efforts of Ripper and Van Damme the Dwarf armour was just too touch to crack – as Losgrom Nightmane almost took Let Ji’s head off with a violent tackle, and Halmorlun Gaintbelly managed to tickle Nuck Chorris so much he was forced to leave the game, in hysterics and at risk of a coronary. Grukdrem managed to run two more touchdowns in and it was all the Midgets could do to try to exact some measure of revenge in the final moments, with Farrison Hjord laying a beatdown on Duridouk Ironmantle. read more

Match report, Baby Bells vs System of a Touchdown

Baby Bells vs System of a Touchdown

Much had been said in the pre-match press conferences, and as the fans packed into the stadium they were hoping for bloodshed, regardless of who it was.

The Bells kicked the ball to System, the fans cheered and the game was underway.

Although a slow start to the match as the Baby Bell players were pushed back by the strong line of Chaos Warriors, one thing was evident: System were out to target Roquefort.

Blitzes from Beastmen and Chaos Warriors alike targetted the Skaven legend, but nothing seemed to take him down. Then, the players parted and the crowd fell silent. Roquefort’s eyes met those of his foe; Chop Suey. The Chaos Warrior charged and the battle was truly on. read more

New for Season VI. Welcome to the Spartak Moscelfs

So with season VI readily approaching a new team have announced their intent to join it!

The Spartak Moscelfs – coached by Tzar Nicolelf, and captained by Rasputelf. The Moscelfs pride themselves of being able to weasel their way out of anything. However the decision to join the league has been made to try and bring some unity within the squad, as Lelf Trotsky and Vladimir Lenelf has been calling for a fairer wage structure and generally stirring up dissent.

However it remains to be seen if they can bridge these gaps, but if they do a sleeping giant could awaken and the full ability of the Moscelfs could be achieved! read more

Brenda brings you all the previews …….

WoWLoF News, Period 4 has arrived.

“Greetings BloodBowl fans, I’m Brenda, bringing to you MY show.  The WoWLoF Preview Show with Brenda.

I am unfortunately joined by the rather annoying Amanto Hugnkyss, former player of the Southfarthing Piemen.  Who for contractual reasons I have to tolerate on MY show”. 

“Oh darling, I am so glad that your back.  And may I say how fabulous you look”

“No you may not!  So let’s get the show underway, and let all you BloodBowl fans know what you can look forward to this week.  Our first game is the Waaarghiors who take on The Poker Men.  It’s going to be a busy week for the Waaarghiors who play twice over the next few days, and the question is do they have the staying power?” read more

Basherz vs Doomaxes. Dan vs Robin.

In Blood Bowl as in life some rivalries transcend the norm. Some emnity becomes so great as to take on its own life force to have its own power and will, to carve out its own destiny. There is a fine line between love and hate, between friendship and distrust. The greatest rivalries then are formed when a perfect friendship is broken. When love and fealty crumble in the face of ambition and greed.

Monday Night Blood Bowl in conjunction with Tritex Games returns with a bang live from the Robin’s Nest Stadium as defending WoWCoF Champions the Badizt Basherz take on the seemingly unstoppable Darkland Doomaxes. As if the game wasn’t big enough, the rivalry between the coaches adds an extra spice to things. You see Doomaxes Coach Robin Neill brought Basherz Coach Daniel Cunningham into WoWLoF last season. Acted as his mentor and helped him navigate the choppy waters of his first season. One can only imagine how Neill(already driven into the lunatic arms of the chaos God’s by the repetitive deaths of his Ogre Ray Meats) felt seeing Cunningham lift the WoWCoF in his first season. I’m sure it was made worse when his Troll Vomitspawn quit the team and signed for the Basherz. The anger, the humiliation and the sense of injustice must have been humiliating….. and so Neil was pushed into the arms of the only race that would understand – Chaos Dwarves. As for Cunningham, many think he is blissfully unaware of his former friends termoil coaching Orcs is after all a business devoid of the need for much emotional connection. read more

Match Previews for 15 May 2018

Hello Everybody and welcome back to another exciting week of WoWLoF. We are now over halfway through period three and the tables are taking some sort of shape. As we all know things can all change on the roll of a single die so anyone currently struggling, you may still make the play-offs. Those league tables look very tight in the middle. As always we’d like to thank Jason Tritex Thornton and https://www.tritex-games.co.uk/ for sponsoring this league. Feel free to check them out, they are here for all your gaming needs. read more

Weekly previews

Good Evening Ladies and Gentlemen, Oli, Welcome back to another week of WoWLoF, the second week of period 3 is about to begin and what the FREAKING HELL IS GOING ON?!! The tables are turning and things are not going the way I thought they would. A Previous champion has returned to fill the gaping hole left behind by the departure of a fan favourite and WoWLoF has JOB VACANCIES?! Oh my days things just get crazy sometimes.. I bet Jason Tritex Thornton is glad he threw in with us lot, its a good job we have https://www.tritex-games.co.uk/ to help us with all our gaming needs. That reminds me… I might make a Khemri team… Better click the link and see what I can Buy… read more

The start of period 3

And so dawn rises on Period 3. The first week of the beginning of the end, we’re over halfway and everyone is going strong. In getting this far we’ve had thrills and spills, we’ve lost a dear friend and we’ve all made sacrifices. With 16 play off places to play for and 8 more weeks to go, shit is starting to get real.

Can the early leaders maintain the pace, who will come from no where to make a challenge and what the fuck will the Piemen do next.
This weeks WoWLoF sponsored by www.tritex-games.co.uk sees some fascinating fixtures read more

Carnage in the Piemen v Lovers game

Breaking News.

“Good evening Bloodbowl fans, I’m Brenda, live at the match between the Southfarthing Piemen & Warpstone Lovers. It is absolute carnage here, bedlam even, and rumours are abound that Lovers have angered Nuffle himself. For those of you who have missed this match, allow me to fill you in on this evenings events.

The Piemen, without Spruce Lee, recruited Deeproot and Zara for this matchup. Coach Watson looked perturbed, but regardless his team got off to a flier with star gutter runner, Creep, scoring in the first few minutes. He then capitalised on the Piemen’s inability to pick up a ball to sprint in, and put the Lovers 2-0 up.
Coach Watson was looking relieved, but this game was about to turn on its head.
Coach Smith was seen bellowing at his players, and this obviously woke them up as Franky Footstool gathered the ball, and was throw by Capt. James T. Birch to pull one back. 2-1 going into halftime. read more

Breaking News- Piemen vs Lovers. It’s on………

Breaking News WoWLoF fans.  I’m Brenda, and I’m back with a special bulletin.  Just confirmed for tomorrow evening, last minute game added to the fixture list.  It’s THE SOUTHFARTHING PIEMEN vs THE WARPSTONE LOVERS.  

This will be an interesting matchup with the Piemen going against Skaven for the first time, and without star treeman, Spruce Lee, who was injured last time out against the Basherz.  But head coach Matt Smith, is a crafty one, and will surely have hired one or two replacements.  As for the Lovers, they have two gutter runners in Tsace Creep & Knetrch Mud who are scoring for fun, and I’m sure their other runners will soon catch up in the touchdown scoring stakes.   read more

Amanto & Spruce Show. WOWLOF previews.

April 24th.

Theme music 🎶 plays, a true fanfare.  The lights gently increase in intensity until the studio is illuminated fully.  The drapes and set scenery are brilliant blue’s, yellow’s and green’s.  Seated on a huge chair, atop six pillows, is the most flamboyantly dressed halfling.  The camera zooms in.

“Greetings my darlings, and welcome to ‘The WoWLoF Preview Show’, hosted by the wonderfully fabulous Amanto Hugnkyss.  That’s me.  This new format will see me joined by my long time friend, Spruce Lee.  Starting Treeman for The Southfarthing Piemen”. read more

Match Previews, & goodbye to one of the best.

Welcome back to another week of WoWLoF Sports fans and what a strange one we have for you.

As always this is sponsored by Jason Tritex Thornton of https://www.tritex-games.co.uk/ Check them out for all your gaming needs.

Lets kick off this pre-show with Bloodweiser where we see Skaven Vs Nurgle!!

Olde Ratty Gitz Vs Kurgan Kings
Dan Reynolds VS Martin William

This week where we see the Gitz looking to move up to joint first alongside those pesky Dark Elfs and we see the Kings looking to avoid the meat grinder down there at the bottom of the table.. read more

WoWLoF Period 2, week 2, match preview

WoWLoF Period 2, match previews 10 Apr.

Good evening sports fans, and welcome to this weeks WoWLoF period 2, preview show. I’m Brenda, your host for the evening, and tonight I’m once again joined by two season veteran of the Southfarthing Piemen, Amanto Hugnkyss. Once again thanks for joining me this evening Amanto.

“Oh Darling, I wouldn’t have missed this for the world. And might I say how wonderful you look this evening, the leather and horns really bring out the glow in your eyes” read more

End of Period 1, Match Previews

WoWLoF, last week of period 1.

Welcome Bloodbowl fans to WoWLoF, brought to you by Tritex Game of Staffordhiem, for all your Bloodbowl needs. I’m Brenda, and what an action packed period we’ve had, and it’s not over yet. We have four more brutal matches for you this week, but before we get into those, let me introduce this weeks guests.
First up we have regular pundit and friend of the show, Nuralja Pestigor. Due to an unfortunate drink driving allegation, Twitch won’t be with us this week. But we have a special guest this week, straight from his match against the Dead Skins, Amanto Hugnkyss from the Southfarthing Piemen.
“Thank you darling, mwah mwah”
So Amanto, you got injured last week, how are are you feeling tonight?
“Well darling, I’m unfortunately out for the season, but this will allow me time to promote my new line of scarfs. They are fabulous, do you not think?”
They are certainly ….. colourful.
“Why thank you darling mwah mwah” read more

WEEK 3 Match Preview. With Brenda & Guests

Week 3 WoWLoF Preview.

“Don’t change your crystal balls viewers, you’re exactly where you should be. This is your WoWLoF preview show, and I’m Brenda. Once again I am joined by our two resident Blood Bowl experts, and former WoWLoF legends, Twitch and Nuralja.
“Let’s jump straight into the upcoming action, as we take a look at the upcoming DRAKENHOFF DANCERS vs KURGAN KINGS. Being a former Nurgle player yourself, lets come to you first Nuralja”.

Nuralja – “Well Brenda, this is actually a tough one to call. The KINGS are new to WoWLoF this season, and that in itself can present a whole host of different pressures. They need to find a rhythm and quickly. But they do have a potentially good signing in Flu Lee, who I believe likes to be called ‘Tiny’. This beast is big and strong, and has the potential to cause some serious injurie to any who go against him.” read more

Week 2 match preview. With Brenda & guests

“Blood Bowl is well and truly back. Touchdowns will be scored and blood will be spilt. I’m Brenda, and this is WoWLoF.

During this week’s show, we will bring you three big match previews. But first allow me to introduce two former WoWLoF legends, who join me in analysing this weeks matches. First up we have a player who holds a Fido Bowl winners medal. One of the most prolific touchdown scorers ever to grace the league, holding at one time the record for most TDs. Please welcome former Dirty Rats great, Twitch. Welcome to the show.” read more

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Blood & Guts Magazine Presents WOWLOF 4

FIDO MEMORIAL BOWL

Prehensile Renegades vs System of a Touchdown

Ladies and Gentlemen welcome to the Blood & Guts Magazine’s Fido Memorial Bowl special.
In this issue we will reviewing each teams progress to the final, taking an in depth look at the strengths of both side and hearing from Blood Bowl Legends Grishnak Blackhoof & Sillibilli .
The fourth season of the Wargamers of Wolverhampton League of Fear Tournament (WOWLOF) has been the biggest in its history with 96 games so far. We’ve had a record number of fatalities with 43. Vampire Thrall is the most killed player type, narrowly beating out Human lineman and Snotling.
We’ve had a record number of casualties with 386 at an average of 4.02 per game and a record number of touchdowns with 273 at an average of 2.8 per game. Truly and utterly phenomenal.
Returning superstars like Chop Suey, Hopper, Maggie and Stitch have been joined by new names like Cotan, Teh-Kan, Darkhoof, James T Birch, Grova, Atticus, Likeabatoutahelf, Roquefort, The Mummy and Growthrow to name a few. We’ve seen the birth of new legends and start of new epic stories.
We’ve continued the extended play off period starting with quarter finals that has worked better than ever and also a plate competition called the WowCof.
Enjoy this special issue of Blood and Guts and thank you for taking part.
The Commissioner. read more

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Season V is coming…

“What a season it has been in the WoWLoF. We have new champions to celebrate, both of whom have give us thrills, spills and a fair amount of kills. Lady’s, gentlemen, dwarfs and trolls, I’m Brenda, and this is your season 4 summary.”

“This past season saw the creation of three leagues in WoWLoF. We had Bugmans, Bloodweiser, and Orcidas. With a host of new teams joining, such as Da Badizt Basherz, Baby Bells, Southfarthing Piemen and the Village Green Preservation Society, plus many others.
We had saw blood spilt and Bloodbowl careers cut short, as we lost fan favourites such as Snowy the werewolf. Killed playing against new entrants to the league, the Prehensile Renegades.
In addition we also lost potential rookie of the year, Roscoe Fatfingers of the Piemen. After making an unbelievable interception and assist for an unlikely Touchdown, he was smashed by the both beautiful and viscous dark elf, Maggie.”
read more